One Ring to Rule Them All

Super Bowl XLV
Sunday, February 6th, 2011.
Dallas, Texas.
Approximately 10:52 PM EST.

Aaron Rodgers and Ben Roethlisberger meet at the middle of the field in Cowboy Stadium to shake hands in front of 80,000+ fans and 100+ million worldwide.

Who has the “One Ring to Rule Them All?”

Who is immortal?

What were the Black Eyed Peas singing about?  That was singing right?

How much did those frickin’ seats cost???

Actually the first thing I should do is calm down all my friends hidden in their lairs of nerdery.  Please don’t expect an in-depth perspective on Lord of the Rings.  YOU MUST GO SEE IT! I have nothing against Mr. Tolkien but put your cloaks back into your closet, put down your 20 sided die, push your glasses up your face and keep reading this article if you want a girlfriend one day or at least move out of your moms basement.

Not these guys...wait...is that Rudy?

Wow, thats harsh…but probably 90% truth.  Well maybe 50/50.   Regardless, this is about two men not in your collection named Frodo, Sam, Gandalf or any other names I get from Wikipedia or my Tolkien freak brother.  This is about men from the cold bleakness of Green Bay, Wisconsin to the blue collar neighborhoods of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.  It comes to this weekend where millions will see each man push their teams to immortality on the gridiron of men.   It’s really about two men and only two men.

Aaron Rodgers and Ben Roethlisberger.
One Ring to Rule them All.

There my fellow nerds.  Enjoy the reference again.  Now there may be references to Lord of the Rings later on, so you have to keep reading.  There will be math and maybe puzzles so I know you’re excited.

Back to Football. American Football.  We constantly talk about how the QB is the field general and the most important position in the game and I think it’s even even more important in the Super Bowl (or my party is the Buper Sowl, see what I did there.  I’m awesome).  The quarterback make things happen or they don’t and its the most demanding position in football.  Who else touches the ball on 95% of the downs?  You have a franchise QB you do pretty well (Colt & Pats of the 2000′s).  If your QB’s suck, well, you suck (Browns & Bills of the 2000′s).

And these are actual paying Browns fans.

Its on the shoulders of the QB’s.  Out of the 44 Super Bowls 23 have had the QB as the MVP.  That’s three times more than the next position awarded with the running back at only 7 times.  Out of the 55 years of the NFL voting on the regular season MVP, 44 have been QB’s (or shared the title).  How many Super Bowl champs had a bad QB at the helm?  Maybe a handful.

But this is not about all those guys, its about Aaron and Ben and this Sunday one will be separated from the rest.  Immortal.  These two guys will be going after that one ring to rule them all.  I’ll get to that later but first let me compare these QB’s.  I’ll take Aaron first since i’ll be rooting for the Pack.  I married a Wisconsin gal so it’s on the marriage certificate that I’m a Packer fan now.

Aaron Rodgers has begun to push himself into that next echelon of quarterbacks.  He would have been there 3 years ago if Farve would have just hung’m up when he started wearing diapers but the past is the past and i’m not bitter you stupid greedy old man.  Rodgers has shown this with his stats, leadership and a wicked awesome arm that most of his collegues call “the strongest arm in the league”.  He can also put the ball on a quarter.  I hate the word dime because a dime can’t get you anything.  It’s useless.  Just small and stupid.  You can only get something with a dime if you put a dollar with it.  Love you $1 menu! Anyway.  He’s shown he can throw for yardage and TD’s while limiting his mistakes which = great QB.  Here are his average stats for his first 3 full seasons (even though he’s been in the league since 2005, Thanks again Farve) :

4241 yards, 29 TD’s, a smidge over 10 INT’s.
Let’s compare that to other top QB’s averages in their first 3 full seasons.

I'm #2? Really?

Mr. P. Manning : 4095 yards, 28 TD’s and 19 INT’s.
Mr. Brady: 3409 yards, 23 TD’s, 13 INT’s.
Mr. Brees: 3340 yards, 17 TD’s, 15 INT’s.
Big Ben: 2840 yards, 17 TD’s, 14 INT’s.

Compared to these top guys (I know there’s more) he’s already put himself into that elite status statistically.  I also picked these guys because they have one thing that Rodgers doesn’t have.  At least one Super Bowl ring.  But now Mr. Rodgers has also shown that he can now lead his neighborhood through a season full of injuries and deep into the post-season.  A tough post-season at that.  At Philly. At Atl. At Chi-town.  Win. Win. Win.

I have one more tid bit of fun, but for now onto Big Ben.

First off we’re here to talk about Big Ben on the field, not off, so keep your mind on the prize.  He’s not your stereotypical quarterback.  The dude doesn’t throw for the yards.  He averages about 3200 in 7 seasons.  Not bad but nothing elite.  He’s only thrown for over 30TD’s in one of his seven seasons. He’s not a pure pocket guy.  What most people see is that he’s a monster.  6’5, 250.  BUT.  He’s probably one of the best instinctual QB’s that’s ever played.  He makes plays from nothing.  He extends plays like only a couple guys can in the league.  Defensive players say he’s like trying to tackle a snowplow.  Brady(6-4, 230) and Manning(6-5, 235) are just as big, but not a tough SOG like Ben.  Most of all, he gets the job done.  Since he’s been at the helm of the Steelers they are 60-26.

More memorable to my generation here?

Compare that to the golden locks standard of Tom Brady who is 97-30 in 10 seasons.  If Ben wins 12 games a year (which the Steelers can) for the next three years he’ll be 96-38.  Very comparable eh?

But to me one of the greatest attributes of Ben is: he’s clutch.  No matter what you say about how he throws or holds onto the ball too long, he doesn’t choke.  Ben has 19 comeback wins and 25 game-winning drives through the first seven seasons of a player’s career.  You know who else has done that?  No one.  He’s tops in those categories.  He’s 9-2 in the post-season. 2 rings. Isn’t that what matters?  Winning?  Doesn’t matter how you play(sorry Marino), do you win? Big Ben? Yes.

Now the reason behind writing this piece is for one, I get bored a lot, and two, it’s about the one ring to rule them all (AARON! BEN! FRODO!)

It is about THIS ring.  THIS year.  Forget all the other years.  This is the most important Super Bowl for 2 quarterbacks in the history of Super Bowls.

Again, THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT SUPER BOWL FOR BOTH QUARTERBACKS. EVER.

YOU MUST GO SEE IT!

On one hand you have Aaron Rodgers.  Heir to one of the greatest franchises and one of the greatest (previously)beloved quarterbacks of all time.  I mean the trophy is named after Lombardi for crying out loud.  If he wins this Super Bowl he is no longer in the shadow of Farve.  He’s created and started his own legacy.  Think about it, he’ll have just as many rings as Farve.  He’s brought the Pack back to the promise land. If that’s not huge, I don’t know what is.

On the other hand there is Big Ben.  Also heir so one of the greatest franchises and a long lineage of winning.  6 Super Bowl wins. 8 AFC Championships.  The Rooney’s.  If he wins this Super Bowl he’s put himself into some of the most elite company in NFL history.  Quarterbacking a team to at least 3 Super Bowl wins.  Terry Bradshaw. Joe Montana.  Troy Aikman.  Tom Brady. All HOF’s and soon to be Justin Bieber.  You know how many multiple Super Bowl winning quarterbacks are not in the HOF? 1 out of 10 (8 are retired).  Jim Plunkett with 2 Super Bowl wins but had a very below average career. If that’s not huge, I don’t know what is.

It’s THIS ring that will separate one of these gentleman from the rest.  Forever.
60 minutes to decide the fate of two men.
Two legacies. One Ring.
One awesome flippin’ ring.

Actually I’ll probably be able to buy it from the lazy Pawn Star bums in about 9 years.
Did I go a little overboard here?

Keep in mind that a 15 yard penalty is to be assessed if “A tackler using his helmet to butt, spear, or ram an opponent,” or “A player uses the top of his helmet unnecessarily.” I think Harrison’s hit qualifies as both. So I would think that in his post-game comments Harrison would show at least a hint of remorse for the results, if not the actions of his illegal helmet-to-helmet hit.

Instead we got this.

“I thought Cribbs was asleep. A hit like that geeks you up — it geeks everybody up — especially when you find out that the guy is not really hurt — he’s just sleeping. He’s knocked out, but he’s going to be OK. The other guy, I didn’t hit that hard, to be honest with you. When you get a guy on the ground, it’s a perfect tackle.”

Maybe a little contrition form his teammate, James Farrior? Maybe not.

“Today was especially good because he took out their top dog, really. He took out the biggest weapon they had.”

Or perhaps some compassion from the Steelers head coach, Mike Tomlin.

“He played good football. That’s why we have so much respect for him.”

At least maybe we can now understand why Harrison feels the way he does. His justification for his actions are reinforced by everyone around him. I’ll close with Harrison’s thoughts on whether or not he should be fined for what was clearly an illegal hit.

“If I get fined for that, it’s going to be a travesty. There’s no way I could be fined for that. It was a good, clean, legit hit. He came across, I put my head across the bow. I could have put a lot more into that hit than I did.”

Yikes.

Jets at Colts (-8.5)

That is an absurdly high line for, once again, a Colts team that does not blow teams out (thanks Ravens for laying a turd burger on me last week).  I think the Colts will win, but it will be close so i am taking the Jets and the points.  I hope this game ends in a tie and neither team can advance to the Super Bowl.

Vikings at Saints (-3.5)

Lets see, we have a defense that lives off big play turnovers, and a QB with the history of throwing it to the wrong colored team multiple times in big situations.  I am taking the Saints.  And i am hoping they continue on to win the SB, for the city’s first NFL Championship.

Cards at Saints (-7)

The cards are an enigma.  They can beat anyone in the league or they can lose to anyone in the league.  It just depends on what Cards team shows up.  I think this will be a close game, or an Arizona win.  With that said, i am taking the points and the Cards.

Ravens at Colts (-6.5)

The Ravens absolutely destroyed my Patriots.  I can’t remember purposely not watching the 4th Quarter of a Patriots playoff game ever in my lifetime.  Well last weekend was the first time.  Now, will the Ravens suffer a let down after a huge win? Possibly.  But, the Colts do not blow teams out this year, they just don’t.  Because of that, i don’t think the Colts, if they win, will cover the spread.  Let’s go Ravens.

‘Boys at Vikings (-3)

God i wish neither team can win.  Romo or Favre, that is as close to my personal hell in choosing teams as it can get.  Outside of choosing Manning vs Manning in the Super Bowl.  If that happens my eyes may start bleeding.  Anywho, i think the Vikings can stuff the run with the wall of Williams and force the Cowboys to be one dimensional.  I got the Vikes covering the spread and winning fairly easily.  Yup, i am taking Favre to hopefully hand off the ball to the running backs 30-40 times.

Jets at Chargers (-7)

This is a tough one.  I think the Chargers will win, and god i hope they win, but its a bad, bad, match-up for them.  I am going to take the Jets (wincing) and the points as i believe it will be a low scoring affair.

Some chuckleheads would have you believe that the case will be just a blip on the sports legal radar screen, no matter which way the verdict falls. But predictions of what this case will do are far less important than the legal consequences such a decision could have. And doing just that, in mid-2009, Lester Munson painted a much scarier and far more realistic picture, if the NFL does prevail in this case.

• LeBron James, who had been expecting a free-agency bonanza when his contract with the Cleveland Cavaliers expired after the 2009-2010 season, opens the 2010-11 season with … the Cavs, the only team with the right to sign him. Cleveland retains the NBA MVP by slotting his salary into the new league-wide scale.
• Minnesota Vikings defensive coordinator Leslie Frazier, the hottest commodity for every opening in the NFL over the past six months, signs on to be the new head coach of the Dallas Cowboys … at a league-determined salary that will pay him far less than he’d have made if the Denver Broncos had chosen him over Josh McDaniels in 2009.
• The Ricketts family, new owner of the Chicago Cubs, scraps plans for its own cable channel because Major League Baseball has barred all such broadcasts, as well as webcasts, by individual teams.
• A young Detroit Red Wings fan who has saved his pennies for months shells out $300 to buy a replica sweater that would have cost him $80 in 2009.
• Lockouts and strikes loom large in all four major team sports as an era of relative peace on the sports labor front ends and owners begin to exercise their new power over player unions.

Drew Brees all Reebok-ed out

These are not guarantees, but these scenarios are very possible, again if the NFL wins the case. This weekend in the Washington Post, New Orleans Saints Quarterback Drew Brees told a similar and frightening story. Among the arguments he makes, Brees points out that price of an NFL hat has gone up 30-38% since the NFL inked their exclusive deal with Reebok. Now that is a real-world example of what this case could lead to. And even worse, that has already happened.

So if you really care about sports, because this court case will have ramifications across all sports, then keep an eye on this case when it kicks off on Wednesday. This could be big.

During the 2009-2010 NFL season i somehow transformed into the modern day Jimmy the Greek.  Let me explain.  I finished #1 in a group of people that picked every NFL game against the spread each week.  I finished with a 140-113 record against the spread, pretty unreal.  Imagine if gambling was legal and money was involved, i would have won quite a lot of money from the 20+ person pot.  I was on fire all year.  I finished picking the most game correct from my group only once the entire year (and even that one i tied with someone else), but i finished 2nd 6 weeks.  That my friends is a model of consistency.  I used a combination of first instincts and taking the points when the Colts and Steelers were favored (both teams grossly over valued all season long) and rode that all season long.

So with that said, here are my picks for the Wildcard weekend:

Jets at Bengals (-2.5)

I am taking the Bengals to cover.  They have not really impressed me this year, with the exception of their defense.  That is an underrated group.  With that said, if the Bengals don’t put 8-10 guys in the box and make Sanchez throw the ball 20+ times, then Marvin Lewis should be stoned and burned at the stake.  A rookie QB on the road is not a good bet.

Eagles at Cowboys (-4)

In this match-up i am taking the Iggles.  We are 2 McNabb throws to DeSean Jackson and 3 Romo/Wade Phillips mistakes away from this being a blow out.  I think Dallas’s defense will keep this close as they are on fire right now, but i feel the Eagles will not only cover the spread, but win the game outright.

Ravens at Patriots (-3.5)

The Pats are 8-0 at home in the playoffs under Coach BB.  ‘Nuff said, give me the Pats to cover.  The Ravens do not have the receivers to make the big plays, and even though the Patriots lost Wes Welker, their RBs are finally healthy, and I feel that they will control the ball in the cold winter weather at Foxboro.

Packers at Cardinals (-2.5)

No team is hotter than the Pack (sorry San Diego).  I think they will win the game out right and also march through the playoffs.  When you have the offense Green Bay does, and a Defensive Player of the year (in my opinion) in Charles Woodson that is a dangerous combination that can make a deep run.

“Cincinnati is probably going to go into New York and lay down for the Jets and not play them hard just because they’re not going to want to see Pittsburgh in it. All of them lay down,” Woodley said “No one wants to see Pittsburgh in it. That’s just how it is. Everybody knows we’re a dangerous team once we get into the playoffs, no matter how we played the whole year. Once we get into the playoffs, the Pittsburgh Steelers are a playoff team.”

Woodley is referring to the Bengals and Patriots, being the teams “laying down” this coming weekend as they have nothing to play for if they win/lose as each team has already locked up their division and a playoff birth.  Someone should tell Lamar that Cincinnati and New England took care of their schedule, won the games they needed to win, and because they played well have the option of trying to win the game, or resting their players.  Maybe instead of worrying about how the rest of the NFL is afraid of Pittsburgh, the Steelers should have won games against such powerhouses like Kansas City, Cleveland, Oakland and Chicago (a combined 18-42).  Last year the New England Patriots, without the league’s reigning MVP for most of the season, went 11-5 and DID NOT make the playoffs.  Not once did we hear a peep from their players (sure you heard a lot from me, but i am an annoying fan).

One more thing,

“Once we get into the playoffs, the Pittsburgh Steelers are a playoff team.”

I am pretty sure that any team that makes the playoffs, are indeed a playoff team, but i digress.  So Lamar, for accusing teams of being “afraid” of you instead of taking care of the NFL’s bottom dwellers, you get the Drubbing Ass Of the Week plaque.  Enjoy it while you sit on your couch in January watching football.

Win or Lose, i will disrespect your team with trash talking. Hey, at least i am a consistent.

Only Bart Scott can make Joey Porter look rationale and respectful.  With Bart’s latest interview after the Jet’s 2nd loss of the year to the Dolphins he responded with this gem:

“They’re a great team. They’ll probably contend for the Super Bowl. They have a tremendous offense, great running backs, a great quarterback, a great tight end. They are stacked across the board. I’m serious. They are great.

“Like I said, they have a great team. They have a tremendous offense and they showed it today. They are Super Bowl contenders and they will probably take it all the way.”

It may feel good to talk trash and win, but make sure you take the humble pie when you lose, Bart.  Talk trash after you lose, TWICE, showing it was not a fluke and just swallow your pride and act like a grown ass man (said in my best Mark Jackson imitation).  No buddy likes a sore loser, and right now i hate to say it (OK, i love saying it) the J-E-T-S team that came out like gangbusters is starting to sound and look a lot like a whiny, disrespectful, and more and more average football team.  My favorite part of the article is Dungy’s response:

“My mother used to say, ‘When you win, say very little. When you lose, say less. Bart Scott said too much today. When a team beats you twice, give them credit and go home…And I have to disagree with Rex Ryan, they didn’t outplay Miami. Miami’s got three-return touchdowns. That’s part of the game. They’ve got more points than you do.”

Maybe before the Jets hired Rex, they should have let him read-up on the rule book saying that Offense, Defense AND Special Teams are all a part of the game.  When the playoffs start in January, someone may have to tell Ryan, Bart and the Jets that as much as they think they outplayed teams, no one wants to listen to a team that did not make the post season.

The only record LJ holds, is the career rushing attempts in a single season.  One would think this would be enough to shut up a player, but the TO of running backs apparently doesn’t think he gets the ball enough. He has clashed with Dick Vermeil in the past, and now Todd Haley is feeling the brunt of Larry’s rage.  There is no need to call anyone names, never mind your coach.  I mean British cigarettes are harmful and cause cancer if used for prolonged periods of times, not cool LJ, not cool.

I only wish LJ’s twitter account was still public, so i could lay into him for a bit. In case some of you did not know, the week prior to the start of the NFL season, Mr. Larry Johnson was partying it up, drinking, dancing and having a hell of a time in Las Vegas.  How do i know? Oh, because i was at Ceaser’s, in Pure when the DJ brought everyone’s attention to the dance floor, as Mr. LJ himself broke it down.  Now, i am all for having fun and going to Las Vegas, but a week before your home opener does not seem like the right time to party in Las Vegas.  Most players would be studying film, working out, you know putting in dedicated practice time before the start of a brand new season.  But Larry already signed the highest paying contract in RB history, so why should he have to do any of that? He already got paid.  To be honest, i cannot say i am surprised, Larry came into the league acting like an ass, and he will leave it that same way.

Fortunately we can look to the European football leagues for a solution. Split the league up into two divisions by level of competition. [Note: NCAA football has a similar configuration, but until they get a playoff system in their premier league, they're not worthy of being a model for anyone else.] This can easily be accomplished and here’s how we do it.

First, just split the teams up. This one is easy. In the premier league we have 16 teams:

1. Arizona Cardinals
2. Atlanta Falcons
3. Baltimore Ravens
4. Carolina Panthers
5. Dallas Cowboys
6. Green Bay Packers
7. Indianapolis Colts
8. Jacksonville Jaguars
9. Minnesota Vikings
10. New England Patriots
11. New Orleans Saints
12. New York Giants
13. Philadelphia Eagles
14. Pittsburgh Steelers
15. San Diego Chargers
16. Tennessee Titans

And in the second-tier league we have the, err, second-rate teams:

1. Buffalo Bills
2. Chicago Bears
3. Cincinnati Bengals
4. Cleveland Browns
5. Denver Broncos
6. Detroit Lions
7. Houston Texans
8. Kansas City Chiefs
9. Miami Dolphins
10. New York Jets
11. Oakland Raiders
12. San Francisco 49ers
13. Seattle Seahawks
14. St. Louis Rams
15. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
16. Washington Redskins

If the NFL wants all of its franchises to fly high, they need to take a page out of European football's book

Second, make the two leagues fluid. At the end of each year the top-two teams from the second-tier move up and the bottom two teams in the premier league drop down. This gives every owner a greater incentive to do everything in their power to build the best possible team. It also gives cities like Detroit, Oakland and St. Louis a chance to see their teams win some games and not be absolutely embarrassed 12-14 games a year. A few years ago Atlanta would’ve certainly been in the bottom tier, but they would’ve won their way up by now because they can obviously compete on that level. The Bears and the Jets would be the obvious favorites to move up this year, but you also have teams like Cincinnati and San Francisco that would certainly give them a good run.

Third, expand the league from 32 to 36 teams. It makes the math a little easier and who wouldn’t want to add an NFL franchise to their city. And this could be done after the new system is in place for a few years. While there are many worthy cities, The four at the top of my list are Los Angeles, Salt Lake City (only because Las Vegas isn’t an option), Portland and Toronto.

Another NFL franchise in Los Angeles might just be the kick in the ass that Al Davis needs to stop flushing the Raiders down the crapper and start making some changes for the positive, namely stepping down from every responsibility other than writing checks. And they’re a city large enough to support another NFL franchise and they could start right away and just build the team a new stadium as time goes on.

We need some more teams out west, and since Vegas isn’t an option, Salt Lake City is the next best. We’d have a new “home town” team for players like Steve Young and John Beck to land at. And Utah fans have already proven themselves to be extremely supportive and dedicated with the Jazz. They deserve a shot at another professional sports franchise.

In another bid to have more teams out west, Portland makes the list. We’d have another city with unpredictable weather, making for some interesting games and I’m sure we could find another software/footwear billionaire to foot the bill and build a good fan base.

Toronto makes is also at the top of the list for several reasons. The city is in close proximity to other NFL franchises, so it’s not as far as it may seem. It would help the NFL expand outside of U.S. borders which is a priority for every professional sports league. And lastly, I can’t think of anything better than adding another stadium that could potentially become a second venue with the mystique, weather and eventually the history of the Frozen Tundra of Lambeau Field.

This will be good for the NFL, it’s fans, it’s coaches and it’s players. Fans want to see competitive, high scoring games. Period. So when you’re pitting two more even rosters against each other every week you get better football games. Fans will watch those games and be willing to pay to go see them. The situations in Detroit, Tampa Bay and Oakland aren’t good for anyone. This can change that. This would give teams the opportunity to build a strong team, instead of being forced to win now every year. If a team is in the second division they can afford to stock up on draft picks, teach those players the NFL game, let them develop over 2-3 seasons and then when you make the jump to the premier league they’ll be ready to go on a multi-year run. That will also give coaches more stability so they can actually have an opportunity to build a winning program.

I can only think of one legitimate reason why this should not happen. And that’s because it would piss off all the old-timers for changing the league from what they remember it being, and because it would screw with the record books. But that’s happened numerous times before. So for the good of the league and the NFL fans, let’s make this happen. 2010 sounds like a nice round year to get this kicked off. Commissioner Goodell you have your orders, now get to it.