The Drubbing

Where do you find ties this long?

Just when we thought we’d heard the last out of Isiah Thomas. He’s back. Now as the head coach of the Florida International men’s basketball team. In charge of teaching young men how to be better basketball players, and better citizens of the world. Perfect.

As a gesture of goodwill, he’s voiced his intent to donate his first year salary back to the athletic department at Florida International. The terms of his contract have not been released, but I’m sure he’ll really miss whatever they’re paying him. John Calipari had just become the highest-paid coach in college basketball with his 8-year, $31.65 million deal, paying out around $4 million a year. And no sooner did Isiah swoop in and take the crown. Even without his FIU salary, Thomas still has two years left on his contract with the Knicks and is slated to pull in about $12 million in that time span. Amounting to $6 million a year.

Laughing all the way to the bank

So what is FIU getting out of their highest-paid coach in college basketball? A man that has lost a sexual harassment suit and allegedly blamed his daughter when he was taken to the hospital after overdosing on sleeping pills. He ran the Knicks into the ground and made them arguably the worst team in the history of sports because of their bloated payroll and miniscule win total. All while he was the General Manager, and at times the head coach as well. During his five years as an NBA head coach (three in Indiana that Pacers fans are still trying to forget) he amassed a 187 and 223 record, winning 45.6% of his games.

And when posed with the question, “Will you go on the record as saying that the overdose [on sleeping pills that you admitted to earlier] was not a suicide attempt?” Instead of a simple yes or no, he responds with a cryptic, “I love living… I don’t know what else I can say.” Let me answer that. How about “Yes, I will go on the record. It was not a suicide attempt.” Or “No, I tried to kill myself and but it didn’t work. I’ve sought counseling and I very much want to live now.” Is it that hard to pick one of those?

How many games till FIU students will be holding up signs like this?

Of the hiring, FIU’s president said “This is bigger than basketball and bigger than athletics.” Yes, hiring a womanizer to run a group of young men usually is. He went on to say, “Having a nationally recognized coach like Isiah at FIU will have a positive impact on our university as a whole, helping us achieve additional national exposure.” Well if all you’re looking for is a nationally recognized coach like Isiah and expect that to have a positive impact on your university, why didn’t you just hire Dave Bliss. Or how about Jim Harrick, I don’t think he’s busy. Maybe Kelvin Sampson, he’s pretty well known.

And if it couldn’t get any better, it’s been reported that Tim Hardaway, yes, that Tim Hardaway, is being considered for an assistant coaching position. Other candidates for the staff include Shawn Kemp, Lonny Baxter, Don Imus and Tim Donaghey.